funny sentence that might make you smile.. :)

LIKE A CHEESE STICK!
dad its g6.......

A guy broke into my appartment last week.. He didn't take the TV, just the remote. Now he drives by and changes the channels.. Sick bastard..

A boy gave his girlfriend a challenge; to live a day without him & if she did it he would love her more. The girl agreed and she didn't talk to him for a day without knowing he had only 24 hours so live because he was suffering from cancer. She went to his house the next day tears falling from her eyes as she saw him lying in a coffin with a note on the side:'You did it baby,you can do it everyday

A kid gave his teacher a blank piece of paper. Teacher: What is this? Kid: It's a drawing of a cow eating grass. Teacher: (looked at the paper) Where's the grass? Kid: The cow ate all of it. ...Teacher: (looked at the paper again)Then, where's the cow? Kid: It left because there was no more grass.
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C. The Russians used a pencil.
Old people at weddings always poke me and say "You're next." So, I started doing the same thing to them at funerals
Boyfriend = tell me something that makes me happy and upset at the same time :) Girlfriend = your dicks bigger than all your friends... Boyfriend = .....
In your bed, it's 6AM, you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 7.45. At school, it's 1.30, you close your eyes for 5 minutes, it's 1.30.
facebook.com/profile.php?=73322363 <--- sexiest person ALIVE ;)
Lost your pen=no pen No pen=no notes Nonotes=no study No study=Fail Fail=no diploma No diploma=no work no work=no money no money=no food no food=you get skinny you get skinny=then you get ugly Ugly=no love no love=no marriage no marriage=no children no children= alone alone=depression depression=sickness sickness=death Lesson: Don’t lose your pen, you will die.. :P
A wife asked her husband: What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?.. He looked at her from head to toe and replied: your sense of humor.
Boy: Why are you straightening your hair? Girl: Because straightening it makes it longer. Boy: Really? Girl: Yeah. Didn't you know that? Boy: No.. Girl: Ok. Psychiatrist: So, why did you try to put your dick into a hair straightener? Boy: ....
I wish I could ask the sexiest person alive to be my valentine. But it would be pretty weird asking myself.
Today, my girlfriend finally got a Facebook account. Too bad she doesn't know the difference between a wall post and a message. She just described how much she enjoyed our sex last night, in great detail. My mom liked it.
Bob forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.
"Dude she just called you Italian" "Oh hell no, hold my iPod!" "what does that have to do with being Italian?" "Absolutely nothing, why?" "Nothing... I just thought since you were Italian, you'd be holding a pizza or something..."
"Dude, she just called you alcoholic!"- "Oh,hell no! Hold my... haha just kidding, don't touch my VODKA''
"Girl is over her boyfriend house" Boy:(Playing Xbox) Girl:(sitting on the boys bed sad) Boy:Whats wrong babe? Girl:Oh nothin Boy:(Turns off Xbox) Girl:Why did you stop playing? Boy:Cause my baby girl is more important than my xbox Girl:Awh(smiles) Boy:(cuddles with her in bed) Boy:I love you Girl:I love you too Boy&girl:(stare into each other eyes) Girl:(Fall asleep in boys arms)♥
Boy: Turns Xbox on.
5 things you can't do! 1) Lick your elbow. 2) tickle yourself. 3) Draw The Number Six While Making Clockwise Circles With Your Leg. 4) Fit your whole fist in your mouth. 5) Sneeze with your eyes open.
Dude, she just called you Asian, OH HELL NO!!!, hold my eyes open......
Akon-2008 "i wanna f**k you", Akon-2010 "i just had sex", Akon-2012 "that ain't my kid", Akon-2014 "i just got AIDS"...
Your car is Japanese. Your Vodka is Russian. Your pizza is Italian. Your kebab is Turkish. Your democracy is Greek. Your coffee is Brazilian. Your movies are American. Your Beers are German. Your shirt is Indian. Your oil is Saudi Arabian. Your electronics are Chinese. Your numbers -Arabic, your letters -Latin. And you complain that your neighbor is an immigrant?
BOY: you know, you are A B C D E F G H I J K? GIRL: what does it mean? BOY: Attractive, Brilliant, Cute, Dazzling, Elegant, Funny, Gorgeous, Hot! GIRL: so sweet! how about I J K? BOY: I'm Just Kidding!
My girlfriend phoned me and said, "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over... Nobody was home...
*Your about to get arrested* Cop: Your in a lot of trouble! You: wait. wait! WAIT. Cop: WHAT!?
Okay, so you're 10 years old, you have a laptop, iPod, Facebook and a Blackberry. Dude when I was 10 I had pokémon cards.